So I awake on a full and significant day for me today: a seminary Board meeting with a poignant, impassioned idea for which I also have little expectation or attachment. If it is to emerge, great; if not, great. Is that what surrender feels like, I wonder?
More importantly, I am two days from getting on a plane then getting into an Uber/Lyft, then landing at a hotel, then getting onto a cruise ship. Eleven days of R&R with my beloved Brian after a summer of incredible productivity, learning, challenge and faithfulness to heart-work and mind-work we seem to be about. I am tired, and my body is telling me to lay off for a while. I will miss this little one--Nala--and the ocean & adventure of travel beckon.
Mostly, I’m smiling to feel “cusp-y,” as I named with a spirit-friend recently. I feel on-the-cusp of something new, without much awareness of what I desire, what it might be, how I might be in these coming months. I’m leaning into wonder anew, I guess.
I wonder about the felt-sense of excitement and possibility I feel in the work of Stacy Sims, a CrossFit-oriented researcher into nutrition, health and fitness for women approaching or in menopause. Two books of hers await me on my Kindle, for our days-away.
I wonder about a new novel from Christina Baldwin–The Beekeeper’s Question–newly published with all the invitations such a publication offers: a Zoom circle, bookshop openings on Whidbey Island, etc. Christina and her partner, Ann Linnea, were two of the four holders for my Sacred Mountain Quest in 2019. Christina particularly assisted me in growing up beyond my youngish-self’s utter attachment to a dear spirit-friend, so to trust our friendship enough to let it breathe. I anticipate reaching out to both of them in the next day or two, both to celebrate her book, but also to let them know of my forthcoming book, my recent decision to enter into a Sacred Quest once again, May 30-June 8th next year. This time with New Moon Rites of Passage, a circle inviting women into their deepening selves with the Land, one another, listening community.
I wonder what the remainder of the autumn will invite, after the cruise…? Brian and I have so laser-focused upon this cruise as a “are we there yet?!” kind of beacon, it will be odd to not have that to look forward to, dream into. It will be a portion of our woven life together…as we anticipate October and November–a SoulCollage retreat for me, a celebration of Godde’s work at Fairmont and with him November 17th, with family and friends around.
For now, I am blessed to be growing stronger in my Barbell Club endeavors, happy in my body’s wisdom just as it is, curious to lean into wonder as the light shortens, the night lengthens, and our body politic goes through its next catharsis. Amidst so much tumult and turmoil, it is nonetheless a blessing to feel the flow of energies in new possibilities, new dreams, holy listenings, shared with such good spirit-friends near and far.
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